benmarvin: Why do I have so many staplers? It must be fate.
benmarvin: Why do I have so many staplers? It must be fate.
View Articlebenmarvin: @Konstantine Yeah, but what does Dean Cain's grilled flesh taste...
benmarvin: @Konstantine Yeah, but what does Dean Cain's grilled flesh taste like?
View Articlebenmarvin: Listening to Shakira. Shaking my marakas. Digging some niches....
benmarvin: Listening to Shakira. Shaking my marakas. Digging some niches. FUCKLULZ!
View Articlebenmarvin: Dear advertisers, it's time to stop with the "get a bigger dick"...
benmarvin: Dear advertisers, it's time to stop with the "get a bigger dick" ads in the sidebar of porn sites.
View Articlebenmarvin: Stirring mac and cheese makes the exact same sound as fingering a...
benmarvin: Stirring mac and cheese makes the exact same sound as fingering a fat girl.
View Articlebenmarvin: Dear people from the 90's, what were you thinking wearing those...
benmarvin: Dear people from the 90's, what were you thinking wearing those jeans?
View Articlebenmarvin: I honestly can't tell if these two guys are on a first date or if...
benmarvin: I honestly can't tell if these two guys are on a first date or if one is interviewing the other for a dog grooming job.
View Articlebenmarvin: Using Linux for years then browsing the web in Windows is like...
benmarvin: Using Linux for years then browsing the web in Windows is like masturbating then forgetting to wear a condom when fucking a skanky hooker.
View Articlebenmarvin: @HCannonballer Ass whore, you say? Go on... Also, when did I...
benmarvin: @HCannonballer Ass whore, you say? Go on... Also, when did I accidentally block you on Twitter?
View Articlebenmarvin: @paulcarr Is it the #collegeoffers guy again?
benmarvin: @paulcarr Is it the #collegeoffers guy again?
View Articlebenmarvin: The party always goes downhill once people start doing the...
benmarvin: The party always goes downhill once people start doing the vodka-soaked tampon up the butt thing.
View Articlebenmarvin: Why aren't jokes in base 8 funny? Because 7, 10, 11.
benmarvin: Why aren't jokes in base 8 funny? Because 7, 10, 11.
View Articlebenmarvin: I'm fresh out of beer, so that's as good as the jokes are going to...
benmarvin: I'm fresh out of beer, so that's as good as the jokes are going to get tonight, folks.
View Articlebenmarvin: @Gamercore Foxconn made the motherboard in my computer too....
benmarvin: @Gamercore Foxconn made the motherboard in my computer too. EVERYONE IS GUILTY!
View Articlebenmarvin: Giving myself a +K about interstellar Mexican food travel.
benmarvin: Giving myself a +K about interstellar Mexican food travel.
View Articlebenmarvin: Feeding a poor family in Pakistan or Vietnam. I'm actually buying...
benmarvin: Feeding a poor family in Pakistan or Vietnam. I'm actually buying captcha solving services, but same thing really.
View Articlebenmarvin: Nobody knows it, but I'm doing mad butt-kegels right now. Feels...
benmarvin: Nobody knows it, but I'm doing mad butt-kegels right now. Feels good, man. Feels good.
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